The Famous Sparrow Dojo

Ever since a friend shared a memory of receiving a root canal while listening to Elton John’s “Bennie and the Jets” over the Muzak system, I have paid close attention to what the dentist spins while I’m in his chair.

Here’s what was on the playlist today while my dentist did a little drilling (minor maintenance, knock on wood):

Billy Joel, “Big Shot” (I didn’t need one ha ha)
The Allman Brothers Band, “Jessica”
The Allman Brothers Band, “Ramblin’ Man”
[Something by the Rolling Stones that I couldn't hear over the sound of the tiny electric sander on my molars]

Yes, it was a double-shot of Allman. Twofer-Tuesday, I imagine. On first glance, it would seem that I was in that chair longer than four songs, but remember: “Jessica” clocks in at more than seven minutes. It was what I heard during the moments of scarier drilling, and to be honest — you could pick worse songs to hear at the dentist (see “Bennie,” above). It’s got that loopy guitar solo that snakes on and on, and then the guitar basically just turns into a fiddle. Plus, it makes me think of the road-trip montage scene in “Field of Dreams,” where you’re like “Yeah! Woo-hoo, Kevin Costner! Way to brainwash James Earl Jones!”

Jessica - Allman Brothers Band

Flying from Sam Fuller on Vimeo.

Twitter feed here.
8:16 Rev. Al Green, Justin Timberlake and Keith Urban (wha?) perform “Let’s Stay Together.” It’s pretty good, except JT opens with a super long monologue. Also, midway though, Keith Urban explodes into a Jeff “Skunk” Baxter solo that would be worthy of a Steely Dan album. From 30 years ago.

8:24 - OK. Our family disapproves of the Sgt. Pepper fashions worn by Coldplay since the release of “Viva La Vida.” They look more like the Bee Gees in the Sgt. Pepper movie.

8:39 - These guys may be doing this better than me.

8:55 - With Hannah Montana and Taylor Swift, his just turned into my high school talent show. It’s the two prettiest girls in school singing about “freshman year.” And they sound just awful.

9:04 - Quote of the night, so far: “I can’t believe that he is a recording artist.” My wife Linda, on Kid Rock’s Grammy night performance.

9:06 - Heavenly States in a Lincoln commerical. Awesome.

9:23 - Craig Ferguson gets best joke of the night in with “vomit on your shoes and stab you” crack.

9:24 - Katy Perry in a banana. Yawn.

9:25 - The YouTube-interactive thing in Katy Perry’s performance was kind of a bust. They just rolled on the screen in the back, right? No close-ups of her fans singing along with the song?

9:37 - Morgan Freeman is a great actor, but he is not a great presenter. Did he call Kenny Chesney a “private pirate?”

9:49 - M.I.A. moment: Awesome.

9:55 - Paul McCartney and Dave Grohl. Another new-meets-old Grammy moment. Nice idea, but what is this supposed to accomplish? More pregnant ladies!

10:16 - Sugarland and Adele team up for “Chasing Pavements” (after Sugarland solos a Sugarland song that I don’t know, alas). It’s pretty great. Why don’t we hear more female duos?

10:21 - Radiohead whips out a marching band from USC for their live performance. Mmmm. I’ve seen “Hollerback Girl” before.

10:30 - All the presenters are referring to upcoming artists as “their very good friends.” Really? Was there a really sweet party last night, and everyone had a moment?

10:34 - Let’s get ready for the piracy speech! Man — this has been SO effective in the past.

10:41 - Four Tops tribute rolls, and Pitchforkmedia tweets: “and just like that, it’s pbs”

10:49 - Neil Diamond just leaned on a Coldplay member. (And then hissed: “You can’t carry my jock.”)

10:53 - Whoa! Dead-people montage is flying by! Can’t read fast enough!

10:56 - We need another award!

11:04 — Li’l Wayne and Robin Thicke. You have my attention.

11:04:39 - Might have been even more interesting had it been Alan Thicke.

11:05 - And here comes Allen Toussaint. Feet don’t fail me now. This is getting kind of manic.

Best R&B Album: Jennifer Hudson, Jennifer Hudson

Best country performance by a duo or group with vocals (BCPBADOGWV): Sugarland, “Stay”

Song of the Year: Coldplay, “Viva La Vida”

Pop Collaboration with Vocals (PoCaVo): Robert Plant and Alison Krauss, “Rich Woman”

Get used to these two, folks:

Best Rock Album: Coldplay, “Viva La Vida”

Best New Artist: Adele. WOOT! WOOT!

Record of the Year: Robert Plant and Alison Krauss, “Please Read The Letter”

I still don’t think we’ve seen the end of these two.

Best Male Pop Vocal Performance (MaPoVoPer): John Mayer, “Say”

Best Rap Album: Li’l Wayne, “Tha Carter III”

Album of the Year: Robert Plant and Alison Krauss, “Raising Sand”

It’s 8:04 Eastern and the Grammys are underway. If I can take my eyes off the screen, I’ll be tweeting, er twittering, here.

Viper on the football-team blanket. (Note: the Cardinals played in St. Louis when this blanket was manufactured.)

When the band Of Montreal visited Soundcheck last week, we asked band leader Kevin Barnes and guitarist Brian Poole to name their favorite among the many lavish costumes they’ve worn on stage. Make sure to watch until the end, when Barnes reveals a secret about shaving cream.